rainna

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Posts posted by rainna


  1. Hi George! Just a while ago I was thinking how things must have gotten really strage here if George has stopped posting. So thanks for bringing some stability back to my internet life! Big Grin

    quote:
    I love you too! And music pedagogy sounds like such an interesting topic. I'm sure whoever reading it will enjoy your paper just as much as you enjoyed writing it. :^) Good luck on it.

    Music pedagogy is cool, but there are some aspects in studying it that I don't care for that much... But it's just one tiny essay in the whole universe of information, so it's really not that serious. Allowing oneself to write total crap every now and then must be good for the soul. Big Grin


  2. quote:
    I feel like a stranger around here too. I haven't been posting a lot lately, what with all the stuff I have to do.

    NO ONE has been posting a lot lately. Frowner So quiet here nowadays...

    quote:
    I just made an "Introduce Yourself" thread in the "Upon the new year coming..." forum. Been meaning to do something like this for a long time. This'll help make this place more friendly and give it a communal feeling, I hope. =)

    Love the idea! Love you for coming up with it! Yay for communal feeling!

    Also, to stay at least a little on-topic: I really should be writing an essay about expertice in music pedagogy. I don't like the subject and my writing is so bad today. So is it okay if I just surf the net and wait for the essay to write itself?


  3. I would gladly be The Voice of your Conscious! Smiler I'm very sorry that you are going through the same nasty feelings I am but, to look at it selfishly, it feels good to know that I'm not completely alone with this. I guess I've always had some escapist tendencies but during the past couple of years I've been so busy and happy with my own life that the need to get away has become milder and milder. Right now I could just sit on my bed and read books, watch films and listen to music. Anything to take me away from this reality. Usually I'm the biggest procrastinator you can find, but currently I'm doing my schoolwork happily to keep my mind busy. It's better to write essays or practise than to spin same bad thoughts around in your head over and over again.

    I guess the main problem is that I feel very lonely even though I am not. I have lived in this town for something like five months and I've gotten to know people from school. They like me okay. I have my old friends with whom I stay in touch as much as I can. That should be enough! So, I don't have a boyfriend? That's no reason to feel this isolated! I just wish my emotions would do as my sense tells them to do... I'm a needy idiot.

    That Sylvia Plath quote, my gosh! Why have I never really read her works before? That's my thoughts exactly, just phrased better than I ever could. Right now I'm biting my way through one fig but at the same time looking at the others, longing for them. Nothing stresses me like having to decide, but not having any choice at all is at least as horrible as that.


  4. quote:
    Posted 13 January 2011 05:21 PM Hide Post

    ahh, that's such a beautifully bittersweet story. your story reminds me another lovely story -

    http://i.imgur.com/bZzOA.jpg and the resolution http://i.imgur.com/nb3n6.jpg

    (from http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/c...ldnt_tell_the_story/ and http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/c...ho/c1bot66?context=3)

    It's a long comic but heartwarming.

    Lovely comic! I wish my relationship messes would come to a resolution like that...

    Pointless rant vol. bazillion: I don't know what's going on with me nowadays. Almost everything in my life is well, if not brilliant then at least okay. There is a thing or two I really worry about, but that's it, really. And yet somehow I'm so tired, sad and cranky all the time... I have headaches and a sort of general bad feeling in my body, my voice doesn't work at all (and this is really bad for I study singing), I could easily sleep something like eleven hours per night. I feel like snapping at random people in the bus for existing, I tear up all the time. I feel like escaping all the time, like there should be another universe somewhere, a place where I could finally just feel good about myself and my life. This all makes me a little worried. I'm not used to being like this - I'm the balanced one, the reflective one, the one who finds answers and helps others with coming up with theirs. Now I have no answers. I don't know how to talk about this to anyone since there is actually nothing wrong with me. And even if there were, I wouldn't want to make anyone worry. The one person I would love to talk to seems to have totally forgotten about me, and I miss him terribly but at the same time I know that if he were to contact me now, I would be too exhausted and sad to react.

    I carry around a huge pile of guilt for feeling this bad for absolutely no reason when people with real problems hold their heads up and survive brilliantly. Partially, that's why it's so hard for me to talk about this. Thank goodness for internet...

    I'm sounding really, really whiny now... Rant over!


  5. quote:
    I was in my school's library. Not really studying or working, rather committing chronocide by going on reddit and reading the news. Anyway, at some point I dropped something, and this girl with a pretty smile helped me pick it up. I was so dazzled and disarmed by her smile that I forgot to say thank you. I don't even remember her face, I just remember her smile. I think her name might be Holly but I'm not sure. Another instance of FAIL in my life, brought to you by Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band Incorporated.

    Do you guys like/care for my "forever alone" and "socially awkward penguin" stories? I could keep it private and just write it in my journal, but it feels better to share with strangers for some reason. I'll be sure to share more of my awkward moments and my love-life woes. *snicker* ;^P

    Oh, lennonist, inspired by you I'm going to have to share my awkward/romantic/painful/joyful story with you. Hope it makes you feel less alone with weird situations like this...

    I started university last autumn and hence moved away from my family to another town. I still visit them almost every weekend to spend time with them and see my friends. I always travel by train. One time, over a month ago, it was Sunday and I was in the train, on my way back to my school town. My bag was on the seat next to mine. I was listening to music and letting my mind wander, as a boy (well, a young man) stepped in the car and sat down next to my bag. I looked up and found him very attractive - not exactly handsome, but somehow beautiful and interesting-looking. He was listening to music, too, and scribbling to his notebook. I tried to secretly glance at him every now and then, it I felt like he was looking at me as well, but I was too shy to check. After about ten minutes he started collecting his thigns, getting ready to get off the train. He stood up and almost started walking, but instead he turned back to me and handed me a little folded piece of paper. I was completely baffled and unable to do anything but stretch my arm out and let him drop it to my hand. He smiled and walked away, I stared after him. The train had already started moving again when I was recovered from my confusion enough to unfold his note. It read "Hello! I just thought I'd tell you that I think you're beautiful". I felt like I was about to explode. His little note made me so happy (for I am not that beautiful, and no one ever calls me beautiful) and at the same time broke my heart, as I thought he was beutiful as well and wanted to tell that to him! He didn't write his phone number nor his name and I have absolutely no way of contacting him, no matter how much I want to. Every Sunday I sit in that eight o'clock train hoping to find him, but I haven't got lucky yet and I don't think I will. It's silly to long for someone you don't know at all, but I still do. If nothing else, I would like to thank him for making me so happy for a while.

    So techinacally you can consider yourself lucky for having a chance to run into her again and maybe you'll be braver then. Smiler Hope it will turn out wonderfully for you!


  6. Hee, I'm getting overly language nerdy here, but I'm curious! So, English speakers, is it correct to say that Robbie, from Robert, is a diminutive? I mean, in Spanish diminutives (as far as I know, I know very little Spanish!) are quite common and there is a grammatical system for them, Adela -> Adelita, Eva -> Evita etc. So does grammatical diminutive exist in English at all, are there any rules? I know I know, this has nothing to do with anything, but I got interested. Big Grin


  7. ^ Agreed! I hope you'll have good times with your lovely keyboard. I would really love to have a decent keyboard myself, but money is always the issue. I'll just have to settle on the pianos in my school and my old, borrowed and bad keyboard...


  8. Awww, what a cutie! <3 I still find it hard to believe that our baby dog is almost nine months old already and not quite so tiny anymore... They grow up so fast! And grown dogs are adorable as well, but still... PUPPIES! <3<3 Big Grin


  9. Hee, a sort of lame comeback! For some reason the forum didn't want to log me in... But I hope it will work from now on!

    Thanks guys, it's nice to know that despite the absence I haven't been completely forgotten. Big Grin And EeBee, haven't seen you in a while here! It's good to know that you are there anyway. The forum seems quite slow indeed, and even though all the people here, old members or new, are great, I do miss all those people that posted on the forums back when I was a newbie and whom I haven't seen here in ages... Frowner Come back, everyone?


  10. Rant rant: no stixing in a LONG time. Not sure what happened, I haven't even visited the forums! I guess I got frustrated, feeling that no one really talked to me or something else just as drama-gueeny, and then I just somehow forgot to visit. And now I started missing the Srix so awfully! Maybe I'll try to be back? (Rant over)


  11. An impossible roommate situation. I'm so tired of this. I don't like this town, or the people, I miss my friends, and I would very much like a boyfriend right now. I'm in a serious need of somebody to love.


  12. Ha, I can't believe I haven't written to this thread! Joanna definitely is an important part of My Adored Trio of Female Musicians, consisting of Regina, Amanda Palmer and her. It all started with Cosmia, and after falling in love with that song I have been running after her all the rest of her music. Ys and Have One on Me are especially amazing, and I also love the song Colleen that was on her EP. And I saw her live last spring - what an experience!

    I only know two persons who like her or have even heard about her: my 40+ male philosophy teacher and one of my dance teachers. Apparently Joanna is not the most "teenagey" artist there is... Big Grin But I love her to bits.


  13. Oh, almostspotless, what a beautiful uke! I'm jealous! (The signature wouldn't hurt, either...) Where did you get it?

    I had a lovely birthday in a sort of grown-up manner, which was strange. Do everyone lose that birthday feeling at some point? I miss the feeling, but the day was great, so no complaints here. Big Grin


  14. I am about to start my first night in my student apartment. I am sharing this place with two vietnamese girls whom I don't know at all, I'm away from my family and my friends, I've never lived on my own before... I thought I would be able to live here, but not enjoy it for a second, and yet here I am... enjoying. Sort of. It's a little lonely, yes, and I know it will get even lonelier during the forthcoming days, but my room is so, well, mine. I love it. I've chosen the furniture and the curtains and all of it, and even most of my things are still in boxes and it's all very messy, I feel like even though I don't belong in this town, this suburb or this building, I definitely do belong in this room. It's mine and I'm its.


  15. First day of college (well, university of applied sciences to be accurate, but it's somewhat similar to American college and Finnish schooling system takes it's time to be explained) tomorrow! I'm putting this on Good News, even though I'm not sure yet. I think I'm going to love the studies (MUSIC!) but new school, new people, new town, moving away from my family and friends... I'm so scared. And excited. And scared.


  16. I'm living the longest summer holiday I've ever had and probably ever will, and all I want is for it to be over. I want to go to school, I want to go away from home, I want to get away from the thoughts that start bothering me the minute I get away from work or friends or whatever the distraction has been. I want out.


  17. ^ I loooove Joanna Newsom and Emily! <3 Everything I know about meteorites I have learnt from her. Big Grin

    Currently listening I Won't Say I'm in Love from Hercules. The Finnish version, for I prefer Megara's Finnish voice to the original. I'm not especially fond of all the other music from that film (who on Earth came up with this brilliant idea of putting gospel in a story based on Greek mythology?), but this song is great and tons of fun to sing along with.


  18. quote:
    Aaanyway... It's always fun to feel like your parents would prefer you to be a young child rather than who you are now...

    My grandparents would definitely prefer me as the little girl I used to be! Now I'm almost grown up, have my own opinions and do the things the way I want to do them, and apparently that makes me too difficult to deal with... I guess they would like me as a child who doesen't have too many opinions or values on her own. I haven't even told my grandparents that I'm a vegetarian now, for they wouldn't approve. It's sort of sad, for I would like them to like me. My other grandfather died when I was fourteen, still seeing me as a little child rather than a young woman.

    With that said, I don't know your situation that well, but most parents do love their children exactly the way they are. It does take some adapting as the children grow, but evetually, they will adapt. I hope you'll feel better soon!


  19. Right now, being a woman sucks. I should be doing things, but instead I'm just lying on my couch, aching all over and waiting for the pain pill to actually do something. Well, you can spend a day like this as well... I would just prefer getting things like laundry, dishes and cleaning done.


  20. My first ever Regina show was the saddest show I've ever seen. She was brave and did the songs fantastically, but I'm such an emotional sponge that I couldn't enjoy it really. Seeing her so broken was just too much, I felt so bad for her! I should see her again on Thursday, but right now I'm not sure if I can. I get emotional in concerts anyway, but after this last one I couldn't stop crying. Maybe doing the shows is the best solution for her and the band right now, but it still felt wrong somehow that she had do it, hold herself together for us and be The Performer. I'm so sorry for their loss and for the loss of a great musician in this world.


  21. I got accepted to the school I applied to. I can't believe this. I was absolutely certain that they wouldn't take me, and now... I'm not even able to be ecstatic, I'm just so baffled. Waiting for this to hit. But this definitely is a good thing!