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Mary Ann Meets the Gravediggers and Other Short Stories

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1. Oedipus

Dun, t-t-dun, t-dun, t-dun-dun

T-t-dun-dun

Dun, t-t-dun, t-dun, t-dun-dun

T-t-dun-dun

Dun, t-t-dun, t-dun, t-dun-dun

T-t-dun

T-t-dun, t-dun, t-dun

I'm the king's thirty-second son

Born to him a thirty-second time

Born to him with my hair still on

Born to him with two eyebrows on

And that's all I was wearing

When I woke up staring at the world

My mom had been a rather crazy queen

But not at all like a sex machine

She liked to keep her body clean, clean

Thought the world to be quite obscene

But she'd retire to her chambers

And we remain quite strangers

And to see me made her awful sad

And to touch me made her awful sad

And to see me made her awful

And to touch me made her awful

Mm-hmm...

I'm the king's thirty-second son

Man, all it took was thirty second's time

But a spoiled little prince I was not

Had a chamber maid and a chamber pot

And there's thirty-one others just like me

There's thirty-one others I can be

Sometimes I'd stand by the royal walls

The sky'd be so big that it broke my soul

And I'd stand on my toes to catch a glimpse

Of my mother's eyes and my mother's skin

But she'd retire to her chamber

And we'd remain quite strangers

And to see me made her awful sad

And to touch me made her awful sad

And to see me made her awful

And to touch me made her awful

And one morning I woke up

And I thought, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus

Then one morning and I woke up

And I thought, Rex, Rex, Rex

Then one morning I woke up

And I thought, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus

'Cause thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two still counts

Gonna make it count

Gonna make it count

Gonna, uh, oh

Thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two still counts

Gonna make it count

Gonna make it count

Gonna, uh, uh, oh

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the

I'm the king's thirty-second son

There's thirty-one others just like me

There's thirty-one others on the way

There's thirty-one others after that

Sometimes I stand by the royal gate

People screaming love and hate

And they scream, and they scream, and they scream, and they scream

Long live the king, long live the queen!

And to see me made her awful sad

And to touch me made her awful sad

And to see me made her awful

And to touch me made her awful

And then one morning I woke up

And I thought, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus

Then one morning, and I woke up

And I thought, Rex, Rex, Rex

Then one morning, I woke up

And I thought, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus

'Cause thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two's still counts

Gonna make it count

Gonna make it count

Gonna, uh, uh, uh

Thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

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1. Oedipus

Dun, t-t-dun, t-dun, t-dun-dun

T-t-dun-dun

Dun, t-t-dun, t-dun, t-dun-dun

T-t-dun-dun

Dun, t-t-dun, t-dun, t-dun-dun

T-t-dun

T-t-dun, t-dun, t-dun

I'm the king's thirty-second son

Born to him a thirty-second time

Born to him with my hair still on

Born to him with two eyebrows on

And that's all I was wearing

When I woke up staring at the world

My mom had been a rather crazy queen

But not at all like a sex machine

She liked to keep her body clean, clean

Thought the world to be quite obscene

But she'd retire to her chambers

And we remain quite strangers

And to see me made her awful sad

And to touch me made her awful sad

And to see me made her awful

And to touch me made her awful

Mm-hmm...

I'm the king's thirty-second son

Man, all it took was thirty second's time

But a spoiled little prince I was not

Had a chamber maid and a chamber pot

And there's thirty-one others just like me

There's thirty-one others I can be

Sometimes I'd stand by the royal walls

The sky'd be so big that it broke my soul

And I'd stand on my toes to catch a glimpse

Of my mother's eyes and my mother's skin

But she'd retire to her chamber

And we'd remain quite strangers

And to see me made her awful sad

And to touch me made her awful sad

And to see me made her awful

And to touch me made her awful

And one morning I woke up

And I thought, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus

Then one morning and I woke up

And I thought, Rex, Rex, Rex

Then one morning I woke up

And I thought, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus

'Cause thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two still counts

Gonna make it count

Gonna make it count

Gonna, uh, oh

Thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two still counts

Gonna make it count

Gonna make it count

Gonna, uh, uh, oh

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the

I'm the king's thirty-second son

There's thirty-one others just like me

There's thirty-one others on the way

There's thirty-one others after that

Sometimes I stand by the royal gate

People screaming love and hate

And they scream, and they scream, and they scream, and they scream

Long live the king, long live the queen!

And to see me made her awful sad

And to touch me made her awful sad

And to see me made her awful

And to touch me made her awful

And then one morning I woke up

And I thought, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus

Then one morning, and I woke up

And I thought, Rex, Rex, Rex

Then one morning, I woke up

And I thought, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus, Oedipus

'Cause thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two's still counts

Gonna make it count

Gonna make it count

Gonna, uh, uh, uh

Thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two's still a goddamn number

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Thirty-two

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

Long live the king

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2. Love Affair

There was a love affair in this building

the kind of love affair, which every respectable building must keep as a legend

Slowly festering through an innocent by the way

or have you heard

he was perfect except for the fact that he was an engineer and mothers prefer doctors and law-yers...

Yet despite this imperfection he was clean looking and respectable looking

and you'll never find a mother who doesn't appreciate a natural man

So he grew healthy aloe Vera plants by the window

healthy teeth in his mouth

healthy hair on his head

He grew healthy wavy brown hair on his head

the kind that babies always go for with sticky little fingers...

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3. Poor Little Rich Boy

Poor little rich boy

All the couples have gone

You wish that they hadn’t

You don’t want to be alone

But they want to kiss

And they got homes of their own

Poor little rich boy

All the couples have gone have gone have gone

And you don’t love your girlfriend

You don’t love your girlfriend

And you think that you should but she thinks that she’s fat but she isn’t but you don’t love her anyway

And you don’t love your mother

And you know that you should

And you wish that you would but you don’t anyway

Poor little rich boy

Oh the world is ok

The water runs off your skin

And down into the drain

You’re reading Fitzgerald

You’re reading Hemingway

They’re both super smart

And drinking in the cafes

But you don’t love your girlfriend

You don’t love your girlfriend

And you think that you should but she thinks that she’s fat but she isn’t but you don’t love her anyway

And you don’t love your mother

And you know that you should

And you wish that you would

But you don’t anyway

You’re so young you’re so god damn young

You’re so young you’re so god damn young

And you don’t love your girlfriend

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4. Sailor Song

She will kiss you ’til your lips bleed

But she will not take her dress off

Americana

Tropicana

All the sailor boys have demons

They sing oh Kentucky why did you forsake me

If I was meant to sail the sea why did you make me

It should have been another state

Oh stay...cause Mary Anne’s a bitch

Mary Anne’s a bitch

Does it matter that out anchor

Couldn’t even reach the bottom of a bath tub

And the sails reflect the moon it’s such a strange job

Playing blackjack on the deck

Still...atop this giant puddle

Dressed in white we quietly huddle with our missiles

And we miss the girls back home

Oh home sweet home...cause Mary Anne’s a bitch

Mary Anne’s a bitch

She will kiss you ’til your lips bleed

But she will not take her dress off

Americana

Tropicana

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5. Mary Ann

Miss Marry Ann

kept her man

in porcupine gloves, in porcupine gloves

and on that day

as scheduled

they made porcupine love, porcupine love

so stiff and stuck and prickly

he came in and then back out quickly

but lord not any quicker than according to plan

like a soldier, one foot in front of the other

Miss Marry Ann

had a man

named Stan, Stan Buttler

he had no antlers

he had no center

he had no enter and he had no exit

his hair was short and prickly

he came in and then back out quickly

but lord not any quicker than according to plan

like a soldier, one foot in front of the other

and how he loved her apple pies,

how he loved her meat loaf,

how he loved her chicken breasts,

how he loved her pudding,

served promptly at eight o'clock,

served promptly at seven

served promptly at ten o'clock,

and promptly at eleven heaven

Miss Marry Ann

kept her cans

in alphabetical order

Miss Marry Ann

began to have

some thoughts of murder

Miss Marry Ann

started to think

real hard about her future

Miss Marry Ann

preferred her meat

to be freshly butchered

oh she killed him rather quickly

man that woman was truly sickly

but lord not any sicker than according to plan

like a soldier, one foot in front of the other

and how he loved her apple pies,

how he loved her meat loaf,

how he loved her chicken breasts,

how he loved her pudding,

served promptly at eight o'clock,

served promptly at seven

served promptly at ten o'clock,

and promptly at eleven heaven

Miss Marry Ann

kept her man

in porcupine gloves, in porcupine gloves

and on that day

as scheduled

they made porcupine love, porcupine lo-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-apchu!

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6. Prisoners

All of the prisoners serving life sentences

Wait for the earth to suddenly shake

For the walls to somehow suddenly come crumbling, tumbling, and

For the bars to somehow magically break

Aw, there's nothing wrong with them

That a thousand bucks can't fix

That a thousand arms can't hold down

In the ground, they're tattooing the stones with

Cusses like cavemen, yo' momma was here

But they want to run through the air with no barriers or obstacles

Gunmen or guard dogs or priests

And to rise from the mud and start over and over

With the people all dead

Ah-ah-ah, ah-ah

If Hans Christian Andersen could've had his way with me

Then none of this shit would have ever gone down

In my cell, I'm tattooing myself with

Mermaids and swallows, and though I do swallow

My mama thinks I'm grown, but I'm really just little

And someday I will remember

Someday I will remember

Someday I will remember

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7. Consequence of Sound

My rhyme ain't good just yet

My brain and tongue just met

And they ain't friends so far

My words don't travel far

They tangle in my hair

And tend to go nowhere

They grow right back inside

Right past my brain and eyes

Into my stomach juice

Where they don't serve much use

No healthy calories

Nutrition values

And I absorb back in

The words right through my skin

They sit there festering

Inside my bowels

The consonants and vowels

The consequence of sounds

The consonants and vowels

The consequence of sounds

Got a soundtrack in my mind

All the time

Kids screamin' from too much beat up

And they don't even rhyme

They just stand there, on a street corner

Skin tucked in and meat side out and shouting

I'd like to turn 'em down

But there ain't no knob

Born into picket fences

Not into picket lines

All this hippie shit's for the '60s

and a cliché in our times, but

What if one of these days your heart

Will just stop ticking

And they sort of just don't find you

Till your cubicle is reeking?

The consonants and vowels

The consequence of sounds

The consonants and vowels

The consequence of sounds

Ahh ah ah ah ahh ah ahh ah ah ah, ah

Ahh ah ah ah ahh ah ahh ah ah ah, ah

Dan, t-t-dan, t-t-dan-dan-dan

Dan, t-t-dan, t-t-dan-dan-dan

Did you know that the gravedigger's still gettin' stuck in the machine

Even though it's a whole other daydream?

It's another town

It's another world

Where the kid's asleep

And the loans are paid

And the lawns are mowed

What'd ya think

All the gravediggers were gone

Just 'cause one song is done?

There's always another one

Waiting right around the bend

Till this one ends

Then it begins

Sqeaky clean

And it starts all over again

The weather report keeps on

Tossing and turning

Predicting and warning

And warning and warning of

Possible leakage from news publications, and

Possible leakage from news TV stations; that

Very same morning, right next to her coffee

She noticed some bleeding and heard hollow coughing

The National Geographic was being too graphic

When all she had wanted to know was the traffic

The world's got a nosebleed, it said

And we're flooding, but we keep on cutting the trees and the forests!

And we keep on paying those freaks on the TV

Who claim they will save us, but want to enslave us, and

Sweating like demons, they scream through our speakers

But we leave the sound on 'cause silence is harder, and

No one's the killer and no one's the martyr

The world that has made us can no longer contain us

And prophets are silent and rotting away, 'cause

The consonants and vowels

The consequence of sounds

The consonants and vowels

The consequence of sounds

Ahh ah ah ah ahh ah ahh ah ah ah, ah

Ahh ah ah ah ahh ah ahh ah ah ah, ah

Dan, t-t-dan, t-t-dan-dan-dan-dan

Dan, dan, t-t-dan, t-dan-dan

My rhyme ain't good just yet

My brain and tongue just met

And they ain't friends so far

My words don't travel far

They tangle in my hair

And tend to go nowhere

They grow right back inside

Right past my brain and eyes

Into my stomach juice

Where they don't serve much use

No healthy calories

Nutrition values

And I absorb back in

The words right through my skin

They sit there festering inside my bowels

The consonants and vowels

The consequence of sounds

The consonants and vowels

The consequence of sounds

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8. Daniel Cowman

On the day that Daniel Cowman stopped existing

The world should have ended right then and there

Precisely 4:15, when he stopped existing

The world should have ended

How could it go on?

How could it go on?

How could it go on?

Well, I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

So now that we've got that straight

Does it mean that I can fly?

Does it mean I that I can go do whatever I want?

Now that we've got that clear

And you know that I'm not here

Does it mean that I can go do whatever I please?

The premature ejaculation of his death sentence

Hit Daniel in the face like a big round spitball, hwk-pfff

And everything got hazy in the courtroom

And then he stood up and then he sat back down

Another two times in a row

And everything got real slow

Like a gunshot in the movies

And he remembered

Heroin Boy walking through the door

Bouncing off the walls and the floor

Taking off his belt

Taking off his pants

Filling up the bathtub

Getting ready to go in for a swim

Singing, I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

I don't exist

So now that we've got that straight

Does it mean that I can fly?

Does it mean that I can go do whatever I want?

Now that we've got that clear

And you know that I'm not here

Does it mean that I can go do whatever I please?

And he start remembering and remembering and remembering and remembering and remembering...

The Heroin Boy

He walked through the door

And he was screaming

And everybody was like, what's you screaming as if it's the end of the world?

And he was like, well it is.

And I was sittin' in the corner with my pants down

And I was sure someone next door was blowin' up balloons

And they was red and orange

And there was this one lady at the bar

And she was trying to buy gin

And there was this other lady at the bar

And she was trying to sell gin

And it worked out good for the boths of them

And Heroin Boy

Started takin' off his belt

Started takin' off his pants

Started takin' off his shoes

Filling up the bathtub

Gettin' ready to go in for a swim

And I says nooo

You're gonna drooown

He says nooo

I can't drown

Simply because...

Shhhh..

A man destined to hang

Can never drown

A man destined to hang

Can never drown

A man destined to hang

Can never, ever drown

A man destined to drown

Can never burn

A man destined to drown

Can never burn

A man destined to drown

Can never, ever burn

A man destined to fry

Can never, ever, ever

A man destined to fry

Can never, ever, ever

A man destined to fry

Can never, ever, ever die

In any other way

But frying

Lucky that I'm dying

By hanging

And not drowning

So now that we've got that straight

Can't I just be left alone?

I want to take a fuckin' bath.

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9. Lacrimrosa

We keep on burying our dead

We keep on planting their bones in the ground

But they won't grow

The sun doesn't help

The rain doesn't help

Aah..

If my garden would have a fence

Then the rabbits couldn't just come in

And sit on the grass

And eat all the flowers

And shit

Hi, I'm Icarus

I'm falling

Down

Man for judgement must prepare me

Spare, oh God, in mercy

Spare me

Man, I have a terrible feeling

That something's gone awful very wrong with the world

Is it something we made?

Is it something we ate?

Is it something

We drank?

Hi, I'm Icarus

I'm falling

From the dust of Earth returning

Man for judgement must prepare me

Spare, oh God, in mercy

Spare me

Lacrimosa

Lacrimosa

We keep on burying our dead

We keep on planting their bones in the ground

But they won't grow

The sun doesn't help

And all we've got

Is a giant crop

Of names

And dates

Hi, I'm Icarus

I'm falling

Down

On this day of tears and mourning

From the dust of Earth returning

Man for judgement must prepare me

Spare, oh God, in mercy

Spare me

Lacrimosa

Lacrimosa

Lacrimosa dies illa

Qua resurget ex favilla

Judicandus homo reus

Huic ergo parce, Deus

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