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eshbach

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quote:
Originally posted by lennonist:

I only want an autograph from one person and he's dead. ;`( I weep for you yet, Vincent van Gogh!!

I would like a certain something from a certain someone - a single strand of hair. Would that be too weird? I had a really cute friend named Arthur who had rather long girlish hair, and one time, during German class, I jokingly asked him for one of his hairs, and he complied for whatever reason. Then, I asked my token black friend (he was my only black friend and one of the few black people in a rich white boy high school in one of the blackest areas of Milwaukee... something is wrong here), Noah Charles (although, his mom was white, a psychologist actually, so he'd be half-black), for one of his curly hairs, and that was understandable. Do you think Regina would, you know, honor my request if I asked her for a single strand of one of her noodly red hairs? What if I said it was a key ingredient to make a special kind of soup? Well, guys?

My friend, I am sad to say that what you hope/plan for is far too creepy to even consider, and may have far reaching negative consequences for Regina's future interaction with fans. Please don't do it.

Just so this post has something signed in it (and hopefully to restart the excellent posting like Jamie's wonderful collection), here's my Jacket, which I haven't actually posted in this thread yet, so it's fair game:

jacket_small.png

(Click to Enlarge)

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quote:
Originally posted by eshbach:

My friend, I am sad to say that what you hope/plan for is far too creepy to even consider, and may have far reaching negative consequences for Regina's future interaction with fans. Please don't do it.

Is there a backstory to this (like did someone do something already that pushed it to negative point for fans), or do you just think Regina will react badly based on how well you know her? Just curious if we're like.. treading a thin line and this would push it over, or if she would really just react badly.

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quote:
Originally posted by eshbach:

quote:
Originally posted by lennonist:

I only want an autograph from one person and he's dead. ;`( I weep for you yet, Vincent van Gogh!!

I would like a certain something from a certain someone - a single strand of hair. Would that be too weird? I had a really cute friend named Arthur who had rather long girlish hair, and one time, during German class, I jokingly asked him for one of his hairs, and he complied for whatever reason. Then, I asked my token black friend (he was my only black friend and one of the few black people in a rich white boy high school in one of the blackest areas of Milwaukee... something is wrong here), Noah Charles (although, his mom was white, a psychologist actually, so he'd be half-black), for one of his curly hairs, and that was understandable. Do you think Regina would, you know, honor my request if I asked her for a single strand of one of her noodly red hairs? What if I said it was a key ingredient to make a special kind of soup? Well, guys?

My friend, I am sad to say that what you hope/plan for is far too creepy to even consider, and may have far reaching negative consequences for Regina's future interaction with fans. Please don't do it.

'twas a joke. ;-P

I need to be more careful - I thought my sarcastic tone gave it away? Apologies Mr. Eshbach if I scared you into thinking I'd do something rash that would reflect negatively upon this community or put Regina in a difficult situation. (edit: Besides, you don't have to worry about me meeting Regina, because I'm not that moneyed and I don't live close enough to make it to any of the shows with an intimate setting. I like that you used bold emphasis, just for me. I like you, Mr. Eshbach. I think you have really nice hair.)

Obviously, the only person whose hand I'd want to shake (or hold rather) is John, not Vincent, and he's cremated (not that I'm into necrophilia or anything, much less have enough money to afford a piece by van Gogh). I was slightly making fun of the sentimental value of autographs with my half-true anecdote.

I was thinking about a quote by John Lennon... (now this is going to derail the thread a bit) I think he said something like "It's easier to do it than not" in regards to honoring requests from fans to sign autographs (I came across this interesting interaction while looking for a source. <- wow, that video still gets me -- "Tomorrow, we're getting back tomorrow." Oh John.) Eh, found it. Wikipedia has what I wanted to reference.

From Wikipedia:

quote:
As Lennon and Ono walked to their limousine, they were approached by several people seeking autographs, among them, Chapman. It was common for fans to wait outside the Dakota to meet Lennon and ask for his autograph. Chapman, a 25-year-old security guard from Honolulu, Hawaii, had first come to New York to murder Lennon in October (before the release of Double Fantasy), but changed his mind and returned home. Chapman silently handed Lennon a copy of Double Fantasy, and Lennon obliged with an autograph. After signing the album, Lennon asked him, "Is this all you want?" Chapman smiled and nodded in agreement. Photographer and Lennon fan, Paul Goresh, took a photo of Lennon signing Chapman's Double Fantasy album a few hours before the shooting.

The Lennons spent several hours at the Record Plant studio before returning to the Dakota at approximately 10:50 pm. Lennon had decided against dining out so he could be home in time to say goodnight to his five-year-old son, Sean, before going to the Stage Deli restaurant with Ono. Lennon liked to oblige any fans who had been waiting for long periods of time to meet him with autographs or pictures, once saying during an interview with BBC Radio's Andy Peebles, on 5 December 1980: "People come and ask for autographs, or say 'Hi', but they don't bug you".

...

Chapman removed his coat and hat in preparation for the police arrival to show he was not carrying any concealed weapons and sat down on the sidewalk. Doorman Perdomo shouted at Chapman, "Do you know what you've done?", to which Chapman calmly replied, "Yes, I just shot John Lennon." The first policemen to arrive were Steve Spiro and Peter Cullen, who were at 72nd Street and Broadway when they heard a report of shots fired at the Dakota. The officers found Chapman sitting "very calmly" on the sidewalk. They reported that Chapman had dropped the revolver to the ground, and was holding a paperback book, J.D. Salinger's The Catcher in the Rye.

(Mark David Chapman is currently in prison at Attica State Prison, which is highly ironic, considering that John Lennon wrote a song called Attica State in which he sang demanding humane treatment and freedom for the prisoners of Attica State: "Attica State, Attica State, we're all mates with Attica State".)

I also remember a Simpson's episode of Ringo Starr with a room full of fan mail. I respect Ringo for responding to all those letters for all those years. Just recently, to much derision, he announced that he would stop giving autographs because they were being sold on eBay (See news story on the BBC).

There was no point really to this Beatles detour - you talk about what you know, and these were the examples I could think of - but you gotta wonder how celebrities and artists handle being inundated with various requests from fans, unless of course they set up a signing booth. Sure, it's flattering at first, but I imagine it must become a hassle sometimes too for them.

---

To set us back on topic, I have an autograph of a Nobel Prize laureate that visited my high school, but other than that, I got nothing. Oh, actually, I have this autograph of Tom Barrett's son, who happened to be in one of my classes when I was in high school, as a joke you know, even though I've met Tom Barrett a few times (and voted for him against Scott Walker). Great guy he is.

And now I feel bad for messing with the shiny vibe of this thread.

PS: Nice jacket and stuffed heart Mr. Eshbach, nice lobster Mr. Serge, and nice CD collections all. I was a bit surprised to see a signed Jeff Buckley CD at first, with him having drowned and all.

Edit:

RE: RJLupin2 and almostspotless:

I can envision a few cases in which asking for a single strand of hair would be okay, like a microscopy lab. Different rules apply if you are asking a girl.

I'm with Remus. I think she would probably laugh it off, although doubtful if she'd actually supply it. There are only two ways to find out for sure: Ask her for a strand of her hair, or ask her how she'd react if asked for a strand of hair. (joke)

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quote:
Originally posted by RJLupin2:

quote:
Originally posted by eshbach:

My friend, I am sad to say that what you hope/plan for is far too creepy to even consider, and may have far reaching negative consequences for Regina's future interaction with fans. Please don't do it.

Is there a backstory to this (like did someone do something already that pushed it to negative point for fans), or do you just think Regina will react badly based on how well you know her? Just curious if we're like.. treading a thin line and this would push it over, or if she would really just react badly.

I don't think you'd have to know someone particularly well to know that asking for a piece of hair is creepy and unacceptable... :P I feel like that's basic knowledge of how to not be regarded as a stalker, haha.

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quote:
Originally posted by almostspotless:

quote:
Originally posted by RJLupin2:

quote:
Originally posted by eshbach:

My friend, I am sad to say that what you hope/plan for is far too creepy to even consider, and may have far reaching negative consequences for Regina's future interaction with fans. Please don't do it.

Is there a backstory to this (like did someone do something already that pushed it to negative point for fans), or do you just think Regina will react badly based on how well you know her? Just curious if we're like.. treading a thin line and this would push it over, or if she would really just react badly.

I don't think you'd have to know someone particularly well to know that asking for a piece of hair is creepy and unacceptable... :P I feel like that's basic knowledge of how to not be regarded as a stalker, haha.

No, I know that. I'm just wondering if the circumstances were already changed in a way that made the situation between fans and her strained. She's been so awesome to her fans before that I feel like even if someone asked her for a lock of hair (unless they had previous stalking encounters with her) she'd be graceful about it even if extremely weirded out. But Aaron's undoubtedly had more interactions with her than I, so I figured I'd ask.

Back to the topic! I'll post a couple of my signed things when I get the chance... though, I have hardly anything signed by Regina, now that I think about it..

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I think someone mentioned awhile ago that there was security at one of her shows? Or was this venue security and not personal security (like a bodyguard, etc)?

Anyway, if someone were to make a strange/creepy request, I think Regina would simply say no or correct that person right there on the spot. I don't think she's the type that would punish all fans, or limit her interaction with fans after shows because of one weird request. It would take something really stalkerish or extremely creepy for that to happen (hopefully something on that level won't ever happen).

There's definitely some weirdos out there, though...like the guy who is convinced that Regina is his girlfriend/wife/lover/goddess. Maybe it's just some lunatic trolling, but it's seriously some of the craziest shit I've ever read. Eeker

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I spent almost all day debating whether to post this or not, but with the direction the thread has taken, I've decided to go with 'yes'. I suspect I'll feel differently in the morning.

This post is very long-winded and disorganized, so I have tried to consolidate it and make it more sensible. To do that, I’ve put my thoughts into categories, and given them headings (they’re the only things in bold - save some dialogue markers I'm sure won't confuse anything). I realize this is extremely awkward and I may be shooting my own thread in the foot, but I want to properly apologize, and honestly and fully explain why I posted such a firm reaction to lennonist’s inquiry when I did not realize he was joking. If this turns the thread into a discussion of approaching artists instead of posting pictures of cool signed stuff, bummer, but there’s some value there too.

My point is this: Don’t be afraid to post if you have an opinion on any of the topics being discussed because this is a picture thread… It already seems to have gone off course and that is definitely my fault.

Part 1 – Apology to lennonist

lennonist, I'm sorry I missed the joke and freaked out. I don’t know how serious you were about liking my hair, but it’s now short and not parted, with thick messy bangs that are almost too long, but kept out of my face with some product… kind of the opposite of what’s in that picture. You can see it in my latest facebook picture (which I have hosted off facebook so this will always point to the same picture and work for people without facebook accounts) . I hope you still like it.

Part 2 – Regina has a heart the size of her boobs all Russia

This is going to be a really long post and it's going to get really negative, so I'll start with a couple positive anecdotes.

Last May, a few stixers attended Northwestern University’s “Dillo Day.” It’s basically a big one-day festival where they get some fairly big performers to come out and celebrate the end of the semester. The artists (and all other backstage personnel) were in a fenced off area that was shielded by thick green mesh so that you couldn’t even really see inside it. In this area there were some tour busses and a catering tent, those kinds of things. We couldn’t see Regina when she had finished her set, but after waiting a while we got a glimpse of her getting into a Land Rover and heading for the exit. We called out to her and ran down to where the fence had a gate that was only a couple feet high and could easily be seen over.

Regina saw us, and at first said “I’m really sorry, but we have to catch a plane and I’ll make us all late,” and the SUV kept rolling. A moment later though, it stopped and Regina came running out to the gate, explaining the urgency of the flight. We all at least got hugs, and I know for one particular fan, who was meeting Regina for the very first time, it was a very thorough and moving interaction, though I have no idea what they discussed, because it was all in Russian!

In a similar situation, a couple stixers were sitting around on the sidewalk a while after Regina’s show at Dickinson College had ended. We were sitting by the bus, and we hadn’t seen her get on it, so we figured she hadn’t come out yet. At one point, though, a man getting on the bus (who turned out to be her tour manager I believe – Jamie would know for sure) asked us if we were waiting for Regina, to which we replied “Yes”.

A minute later, Regina emerged in what I assume are basically her tour PJs and a grey hoodie (I’m sure some of you have seen pics from this encounter on brümstix or on facebook). That night, even though security initially dispersed everybody and Regina ran to the bus very quickly (though she said it was because she couldn’t stand the smell – of horses, apparently – in her dressing room), we got to have a very long and candid encounter with her, and it left everyone feeling really happy. We even discussed the old song/new song ratio of shows and how that could maybe be tweaked a tad, and she followed up on a particular promise a couple weeks later at Radio City.

My point here is, if you get to talk to Regina in a relatively open setting after a show, she is the most amazing person in the world, and will leave you with a rush of endorphins that is hard to rival chemically (and I mean that seriously).

Part 3 – The declining odds of seeing Regina after a show

Sadly, in the 6 years that I've been going to her shows, Regina's after-show fan-interaction level has already deteriorated from "openly hanging out," to “mostly openly hanging out for 45 minutes or so with a large group of people and with maybe with some security around," to "spending 10-15 minutes chatting once the group is small enough." Now, after the WNYC Performance and playing/reading at the Housing Works Used Book Store last week, which are the last two performances I attended, the situation basically seems to be "maybe she'll do some autographs if you can catch her in time".

To be fair, I can only judge from the shows I get to, but I probably get to about as many as anyone. I think in the last 3 years I’ve been at an actual majority of her shows, and possibly a plurality in the last 5-6 years on the whole. So I feel like I have as big a sample size as any one person, though I am certainly hopeful that the community has more positive information, because I’d love to be wrong about this trend.

Furthermore, a lot of it seems to be the venues. The venue security at Toad’s Place in Richmond scared away everyone except, well, Jamie and I, of course. And the venue security at the Chicago Theater basically manhandled her into the bus. So maybe a lot of this declining interaction has nothing to do with Regina and everything to do with venue security at the bigger venues she’s now playing.

Anyway, I'm just afraid of Regina's fan involvement going to zero and want to do everything I can to keep that from happening, because meeting her is an amazing experience that everyone who loves Regina should get to do.

When Regina does openly meet with fans, she is beyond reasonable in what she’ll do, and I honestly think she might try to give you a lock of hair, if it was the right setting (like after the Dickinson show) and there weren’t a lot of other people around to make crazy requests she’d then have to oblige. So we need to keep the door as open as we can, for the new fans who haven’t had the experience of meeting her yet, and for those of us who have over-indulged and now need a regular fix to keep us going.

Part 4 – Interacting with Regina in public (not at or after one of her shows)

When I last actually talked to Regina one-on-one, it was at Jack's Rockwood show a while back. A subset of our conversation went like this:

AE: "Regina, sorry to bother you, but Jack and Jenny have signed my Jacket, and I'd like to get yours and some others as well, would you mind signing it?"

RS: "Oh cool, yea, sure I'll sign!"

AE: "Sorry, I always feel like it's kind of odd to approach you as a fan when you're just out in public, but it's getting harder and harder to catch you after a show..."

RS: "Yea, well, it's just so overwhelming, and I feel so bad for all the people, but sometimes I just get pulled in too many directions…[i forget exactly what she said here so I won’t try to fudge it, but the point was that she can’t do everything for everyone, every time, but she tries to do as much as she can. And she knows what people want, and she wants to be able to give them what they want, but it’s just not possible.]

And just to be totally honest, I think approaching her randomly out in public is over the line, despite the fact that I've done it a couple times. I justify it to myself with the fact that she has approached me in public. It's not a great rationalization, and I think I've about used it up, so I don't think I'd approach her in public again, beyond politely saying hello if/when crossing paths.

Part 5 – The line between fan and friend

As much as I (and I’m sure everyone else here) would love to be, I’m not a friend of Regina Spektor. At best she thinks of me as Waldo (when she looks through the front rows for Jamie and me at every stateside show – a fact we learned in the brief Dillo Day interaction). And as much as I would love to be, I’m not really friends with Jack Dishel or Jenny Owen Youngs either. Though I think I have become much more “friendly” with them, because they are easy to communicate with (at shows, online, whatever). I don’t feel bad randomly sitting down at Jack’s table at Sidewalk, because he’s done the same to me. I wouldn’t do that to Regina, and I wouldn’t do it if Jack and Regina were together (though I would definitely go say ‘hey what’s up?’ to Jack and then of course be obliged to say ‘hi’ to Regina… in fact I met her cousin this way last summer).

The same is basically true of Jenny, except recently we’ve been communicating more frequently than Jack and I have, and I’ve been able to make it to more of her shows. At the Easton gig, Jenny and two of her friends came and sat at the (all but empty) table I was sitting at, and I even acted as stand in “assistant merch guy/ photographer” at the mercury lounge when the regular assistant merch girl had to leave for some reason. I sat down at the merch table and took pictures of people with Jenny, and it was fun. But I still don’t think it would be right to just randomly approach Jack, Jenny, Regina, or any combination of the three if they were out and about (except perhaps a passing “hello” as two human beings who know of each other’s existence). Because although we may have a developed a very friendly relationship, the scope of that relationship is limited to the music world. In the appropriate venue, I can sit at the bar with Jack and we can basically be friends. But in the outside world, I am, and will always remain, a fan.

[Epilogue – What the christ am I on about?]

Sorry, this post started out as an apology to lennonist, and ended up as my personal thesis on the etiquette of approaching Regina/Musicians in general at shows and in public. Please understand that these are the lines in the sand as I see them see for myself, and not rules I am trying to establish for anyone else. Everyone has different relationships with different groups of people, and those relationships will determine what is appropriate for them in a given situation.

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I totally get where you're coming from, Aaron, and for the most part, I agree with what you're saying. So, don't feel like you shouldn't have posted this. It was very insightful. Smiler

It sucks that Regina's becoming more and more inaccesible, though...

Also, on an unrelated note...

quote:
Originally posted by eshbach:

Part 2 – Regina has a heart the size of her boobs all Russia

...I lol'd.

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I found what you wrote really interesting aaron! Smiler please don't delete it. I think we all need a bit of advice in how we can/should look at our relationship with regina.

We all dream to be her friends, but we are actually fans. We are. Even though regina's way of treating her fans make you feel like you're one of her favorite people in the world Smiler because of the heart being all big and stuff.

I wish I would have posted my signed stuff before this though Wink

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quote:
Originally posted by RJLupin2:

Also, on an unrelated note...

quote:
Originally posted by eshbach:

Part 2 – Regina has a heart the size of her boobs all Russia

...I lol'd.

I've never noticed her boobs.

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