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2012.11.17- Fillmore Miami Beach

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I arrived at the venue around 7:00 with a friend of mine whom I had worked an event with prior to showing up. We changed out of our work attire in the car and I wore something a bit more appropriate. We were both exhausted but I was so excited to finally be at my first Regina Spektor concert. It took us a while to find the place and I ended up paying 30 dollars for parking which was unfortunate but I was too excited to really care. After grabbing a snack to eat at the concessions stand (which was overly priced BTW), we walked upstairs to the general admission area and took a seat. I was more accustomed to general admission being standing only but I was assured by the lady on the phone whom I had called earlier that the seats directly upstairs were for everyone. My friend was exhausted from working all day so she insisted I go downstairs in the standing area to get a closer look at Regina when she came out. I felt bad about leaving her behind but since she insisted I said I would go ahead. There were three girls seated behind us that looked like they were about 13-14 making ridiculous noises and comments that was irritating the hell out of us but I ignored them. After about 20 minutes, Jack Dishel made his appearance. His voice sounded good and I enjoyed most of his songs however I wasn't paying an incredible amount of attention to him. I was not familiar with most of his music anyhow. The girls behind us continued to irritate us and laughed at Jack Dishel's comments about their being too many forms of communication, something along the lines of "there's always Facebook, twitter, Instagram...let's not forget about Myspace!". They sat frantically looking at their phones, one girl stating “OHH WIKIPEDIA SAYS JACK IS REGINA’S WIFE!”.

After Jack DIshel finished his set, the crew began preparing for Regina's set and we had an intermission. I went downstairs while several people exited and tried to locate a good standing spot close to the stage. I found one to the far right with a good view of the piano and figured it would do. I wanted to go closer but apparently the spots closer to the stage were "VIP" and I needed to pay an additional $40 dollars to stand there. I quickly decided it was not worth it. I am about 6 feet tall so I did not have much of a problem seeing over everyone anyhow.

I tried to make conversation with people around me. One of the girls was a very big fan and we discussed all of Regina's CDs including 11:11. I was impressed with her knowledge of Regina's music. I told her about brumstix and she said she would look into joining. We discussed our favorite albums and how anxious we were for her to come out. I also made conversations with other people. One girl stood next to me and I asked her if she was a fan. She responded with a giant laugh and a resounding no saying she was with her friend who dragged her to the show. After chatting for a few moments, the lights went dim and the audience roared in applause screaming for Regina to enter the stage. I felt my heart beating at an increased pace and I could not stop the feeling of anxiety I felt radiating throughout my entire body. Here was my chance. I was finally going to see my favorite artist of all time right in front of me. It felt so surreal and I could not believe that it was actually happening.

Moments passed and Regina pounced on the stage. She was radiant, wearing a striped lacy black and gray dress with leggings. I still couldn't believe she was right there. I screamed at the top of my lungs as me and the rest of the crowd welcomed her in with open arms. She began to sing Ain't No Cover flawlessly! It was pitch perfect. The room filled with her voice and you could not ignore how magnificent she was. When she finished, I received a text from my friend whom, despite her disinterest in Regina commented on how good she was and thanked me for taking her. After "Ain't No Cover”, Regina sat near her piano and smiled graciously squealing "I've never been here before! Thank You!” Silence passed for a moment and I wanted to scream out "FINALLY!" but held back as to not disrupt her too much.

She continued playing “The Calculation” and followed it by “On the Radio”. I couldn't help but sing along to my favorite lyrics, "This is how is works...and everyone must breathe until their dying breath!” It felt amazing to say those powerful words right along with her. That song has meant so much to me for so long. She continued singing "Small Town Moon" and I must say hearing that song live was better than on the CD. It sounded so great with the orchestra and drums and the beat-boxing. It's just so catchy now! I really love it yet it still maintains its power and integrity. After more applause, Regina thanked the audience and said "This next song is really old" and I screamed with joy wondering what she would play. I had a feeling it was Ode to Divorce and when she hit those first few notes on her piano, I erupted out in tears uncontrollably. I have listened to that song so many times and each time, it means something new to me. It was just so emotional finally hearing it right there and the sound quality in the theater was incredible. I couldn't help myself as I quietly mouthed the lyrics and tried to hold back as many tears as I could. A couple behind me stared at me frazzled yet smiling at me in an accepting sort of way. I knew they were not huge fans but they seemed to understand my slight insanity and even stood back during some of the songs so I could see Regina better. I texted my friend saying that I had already cried three times already and she texted me back saying that she's glad I had moved as those preteens were still being obnoxious letting me know that one of the audience members had thrown a water bottle at them. I laughed out loud and was happy with my decision.

Several songs passed and Regina continued to impress me with her flawlessness. She did not make one noticeable mistake throughout the entire show. Blue Lips was a joy to hear as well, one of my favorites on the Far album. The set list went by incredibly fast and Regina did not say much else besides a few thank yous and such. She finished the set with the songs "Open" and "The Party". I loved hearing Open live. It's one of those songs I did not expect Regina to revive and it's amazing that she is now playing it in every show. The audience tried to sing along to the gasping sounds and it was a joy to hear all the attempts for everyone to inhale just like she does. Honestly, I really enjoyed the audience. They all seemed to be fans of Regina and were overall interested, respectful and attentive to her the entire night.

After Regina finished her set, I returned to my seat to meet with my friend clapping frantically for Regina to return for her encore. I thanked the lady in front of me for getting those girls to shut up who had finally left the show midway through the set. My friend said they were being obnoxious and loud the entire show. I don't understand how people can think that is okay but oh well. I had no part in it anyway. Regina finally came out and I cheered as she began to play "Us", a song that I had played a billion times and knew every word to. I wanted to go back to the general admission standing section as I realized that the audience there was way more into it than the audience that were sitting but I did not want to leave my friend again. Regina continued with Fidelity, Hotel Song, and Samson. Samson was a crowd winner with everyone standing and singing along. I find it odd that I don't have the amazing emotional connection to the song as everyone else seems to have though I do love and appreciate it. For some reason, Ode to Divorce will have me bawling but Samson will just leave me in admiration. Maybe it hasn't connected to me in that way yet.

Regina bowed and after a few more thank yous, walked off the stage for the final time. I thanked my friend for bringing me and she said she was willing to stay and wait for Regina to come out after the show. I couldn't believe how good of a friend she was being and I thanked her again in tears. She was starved so we went out to grab some food. We went to Starbucks and than a pizzeria where she ordered a slice of pizza. I was not very hungry so I sipped on my drink as we walked back to the venue. We got lost on the way back but eventually found our way. I am awful with directions. Thank God for my phone/gps.

Once we returned, I tried to figure out where I could go to have a chance to meet Regina. It took a few minutes and I asked one of the workers (stupidly, I might add) who responded "OHH NOOO! The artist?! LOL they don't come out after the show! They IMMEDIATELY jump on their tour buses and drive out right after! LOL I’m sorry honey! Are you a big fan?" I nodded and rolled my eyes. I remember reading on these forums that the bus was usually directly behind the venue so we walked around to the back where we met up with a crowd. I was relieved and elated that I had found the area where she was most likely to come out. We waited about an hour and finally after a couple of false alarms (loud applauses for crew/band members), Regina came out, looking comfortable, wearing a pair of jeans and red t-shirt with a black jacket. She seemed so happy and smiled from ear to ear. She signed autographs and hugged one of the fans which ended up being a bad idea as everyone began requesting hugs from her. She soon said "I don't think I can give anymore hugs! No more hugs guys :(". I was sad I would not be getting a hug. At least 70 people were waiting to see her and her bodyguard was not having anything to do with it. He said in a stern voice rushing everyone, "Pictures on the fly! No pictures with Regina. WAY too many people! Just autographs!". I was sad about this as I really wanted a picture with her. I also realized I had left my WWSFTCS cd in my friend’s car so all I had was my ticket for her to sign. I heard her bodyguard saying something about how she might have to stop signing autographs soon and I pushed to the front of the crowd where she quickly signed my ticket. All I could say amongst the chaos was "Thank You Regina". It didn't seem like enough but it would have to do. After all, that pretty much encompasses all I really meant to say anyway. Thank You. Thank you for being amazing. Thank You for being free creatively. Thank You for not giving a fuck what anybody wanted from you and putting out such amazing music into the world. Thank You for touching my soul and inspiring me to be the person I am today. Thank You for getting me into writing, poetry, music, wanting to play the piano, opening myself to becoming artistic person I know has always been inside me Thank You for making me realize that it's more than okay to be myself. Thank You!

I know I'll see her again and get my picture and hopefully my autograph but this was an amazing first show. She seems to get more and more popular everyday and I am happy for her. She really does deserve it. If she comes back to the states, I plan on flying/driving and seeing more than one show. One was just not enough. She is worth every penny.

We drove back to my friend’s house and I was in such a dazed state that I drove home drowsy and forgot to put my alarm on to meet my friend for a ride to work the next morning. It was almost 4 AM when I got home and I needed to get up at 6. I ended up having to drive the hour trip back to work on my own (it was a temporarily 3 day gig). I felt bad but I knew it was so much to take in. Luckily I did not make it there too late and ended up finishing my shift okay.

I'm so grateful to be in the world with such amazing art and music and Regina has opened me up to all of it. One of the quotes Regina has said that I think about everyday is that everyone should be free to love whatever they want and no one should be surprised by anything. I felt so free to love her music that day. So careless of what other people thought. kind of the "black sheep" of my family and friends, I used to hide who I was and now I've grown to appreciate the artsy creative person that I am and Regina has had a lot to do with that. It was definitely one of the best days of my life. Anyway pictures below:


instagram picture with my signed ticket


shot with jack

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Sorry, I wrote this in November but I’m only just posting now. I have no excuse. Happy Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas, and New Year. Enjoy!

Last day of the US tour for regina and co and for me too. Very bittersweet, it’s been a blast, but a little exhausting and I’ve totally neglected all other aspects of my life (haha) but who cares? You don’t get these opportunities every day.

I was holding out making plans for this trip, for one because I was worried regina would be super sick by now and two because it seemed, even in my estimation, a bit ludicrous to go all the way to Miami (a place I’ve never been) alone just for regina after seeing her a bunch of times already. In the end, I concluded that regina was not excessively ill and I’d obviously regret just sitting around my apartment not going. Due to my procrastination, in order to actually get to Miami, I had to fly out of Baltimore (which I’d never done) on Saturday (the day of the show) and just pray that flight would be on time. Luckily it all went smoothly and I made it there without a hitch. Man was it hot. I tried to prepare myself to go from 40 degrees to 80, but it was still overwhelming! After checking in to the hotel, I had a few minutes (literally) to see the beach. It was much more tropical looking than I’d expected, and being so late in the season there were very few people around. Although I didn’t get to swim, I got to stick my feet in the water. There’s something revitalizing about it, as if I’m always unconsciously marking off days in my head until I touch the ocean again. Set that clock back to zero!

Just after 5, I got changed and headed to the venue, salt still on my legs. The looming, aqua and white, art-deco Fillmore was more of a compound than a music venue. The monstrously huge, long building, entrenched by yards and yards of metal fencing forced me to walk a couple blocks to even find the bus. It was locked down tight. Yes, this was going to be hellish afterwards, I knew. By 5:20 a good 30 or 40 people were waiting in the GA line. A family of 3 was already in line ahead of me in the special pass line, which by some miracle I spotted hidden away on the side of the building. We had a small respite alone for a while in this awkward velvet-roped-off area with benches that almost totally precluded the formation of a “line.” Luckily I had time to take care of my emergency patient calls and phone in the necessary prescriptions before any more people came. A middle-aged woman showed up to claim a spot in line for her daughter “who’s a huge regina fan,” but was getting food first. Eventually said daughter and a son, plus a friend showed up. By 6:30 a line of 30 or 40 people had formed, much more than in Atlanta, roughly on par with Detroit. Then, security unexpectedly started letting us inside. what was going on? I had no clue, doors weren’t until 7:30. This was way too soon. Turns out they have a small lounge that they let us into for an hour (obvious money-making tactic) before actually letting us into the theater area. I was not impressed; to me it just meant nearly another hour of standing in a new place anxious and excited having to re-jockey for position. Gah…This whole lounge scene, it’s probably nice for people who care less than me, it did have bathrooms and seats and drinks (for the record it was $14 for mixed drinks in “plastic” cups. Outrageous much?!?). To me, all just DISTRACTIONS.

It was essentially 7:30 when they finally let us inside for real, directing us all to go to the right. The daughter & friend, both high school age, informed me, “we’re staying with you, because you know what to do.” Haha. Anyway just at the threshold of the theater doors they again held us from entering. Two not-so-pleasant women were announcing to us loudly and not particularly politely that we could take pictures, but not use flash. “If ANYONE uses a flash regina is going to stop the entire show and you are going to be removed from inside.” They kept hammering us, “MS. Spektor DESPISES camera flashes, and she WILL flip out and stop playing if she sees one.” It was overkill, and uncomfortable. It was untrue. It felt wrong, these people are just the shitty venue staff, they don’t know Regina from Eve, and yet they are representing her –poorly, I might add. They’re putting words in her mouth and painting an image of her that’s far from accurate. It burned me, but what could I do?

After taking the best spot inside the very small pit area, I had to calm at least a dozen people’s fears of, “OMG is she really mean like that? Will she really leave the stage? Have you ever seen someone take a picture with a flash? What happened????” From the first instant that room was ultra-high energy. I was trying to chill out in my little world alone. Soon however, the couple next to me starting talking, “ok, I feel like I’m in a high school movie right now.” Turing to me, “hey, how old are you?” Me: “28.” Them: “WHAT!?!? Are you serious?!” “yeah…” “Ok, well, that explains why you seem so composed and calm compared to everyone else here. But you don’t look that old!” It was, quite possibly, the best compliment of my life (not the age part, the composure part! =D) We got to talking for a while, thankfully killing time. They were cool, but clearly not diehard regina fans.

Jack came out after what seemed like a long time. My view was good, but things were set up fairly far back on the low stage. His whiskey was in a green cup. This surprised me. He’s had all kinds of cups red, blue, clear, but never GREEN. I guess green solo cups just aren’t that prevalent, but for some strange reason I felt transfixed by that alien cup next to him as he went on preforming his regular ipod set. As usual, he mentioned his various social media sites, and some guy, off to my right a ways, was very excited about the myspace prospects. Lol I was just trying to savor every last bit of the music, especially It’s A Boy, Kick ‘em Out, and Magic and Long Live the Future (oh yeah, and all of them haha), because I don’t know when I’ll get to see Jack play again. Sad…

The inbetween sets was interminable. It was extra long. People were starting to complain a lot. I was dying for her to hurry up too because more and more people were cramming themselves in the tiny front-most pit area and I was being crushed into the rail. There was zero preservation of personal space. A girl was physically adhered to my back side; I had to feel her touching my butt for basically the entire show. Is that necessary?!

After an eternity, it was finally time. The band took their places, Mathias walked out gingerly with a cane. What?! Regina then appeared from the depths of stage left wearing the now-familiar short black and white striped lace dress (from Cleveland/Beacon) black tights and patent leather oxfords and began to sing Ain’t No Cover. Her pinned-back hair seemed to have extra volume and her red nail polish was pristine. L O V E as always.

Not 3 lines into The Calculation, I caught a whiff of marijuana. Fortunately it was incredibly brief as the photographers clicked away in front of me. She continued with On the Radio backed by a room full of people. But then. My heart stopped. The photographers were exiting, hurriedly, at the end of On the Radio, BEFORE Small Town Moon. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I was instantly nervous that my words had had the power to make this happen (since I had just complained in my Atlanta post about the photographers wrecking small town moon). Then again, I reasoned, regina seemed to hate them as much as I did, so maybe it was just her choice to make them leave, and I could safely revel in the fact that we saw things the same way. Either way, it was a very happy development. Unfortunately, the high school girl next to me didn’t see things as I did and was taking calls from a phone not on vibrate. She and I had already forged a tenuous relationship, so could forgive her, once. However she continued to be an idiot during Ode to Divorce, yapping on about how “Alex” “loves this song” and then proceeded to call someone who I can only assume was “Alex” and talk to them. I was ready to break her phone. With my left arm pressed against her chest, I began to silently smolder with rage towards her.

The crowd, if I had to describe it in a word- DESPERATE. They were excessively noisy and generally poor singers. Hardly anyone produced a witty comment for regina. In fact, very few produced a comment at all, it was as if they were all just reaching, leaning forward between songs pleading for her to notice them. It was weird. Although, some guys on my right did shout comments in Russian which they said had taken up learning because of regina (I liked them immediately =). Due to all the bodies atop mine, I apparently had some trouble taking all complete videos (didn’t realize this until now…so sorry about that.) The two most popular mantras of the night were “I’ve waited 5 years for this!” and “FINALLY! Regina NEVER comes to Florida.”

She went on with the regular setlist playing basically flawlessly. She made the little “increase piano” gesture early in All the Rowboats which was countered a moment later by mysterious worried gesture back to the soundboard never interrupting the song. She’s good like that. I smiled to myself as I noticed that the familiar silver heart, noticeably absent for the rest of this tour, again decorated the side of her mic. Or rather, someone had drawn it over the electrical tape that was holding the two mics (some tech person, feel free to correct me on her setup) together.

As a sea of people around me puzzled “are they really married?!” I tried to soak up every second of Call the Brothers. Although Jack and Regina’s interaction was unfortunately minimal, the song was as beautiful as ever. Blue Lips was full of sing-alongs and punctuated boughts of chatter. And things went from bad to worse during Prayer of Francois Villion, which is really the litmus test for a good audience. If they behave when they don’t understand the words, they’re ok in my book, if not, why even be there?! Regardless, regina sang it incredibly. For me it’s always a highlight, it’s pure emotion and power. For people to ignore it in their own immaturity is a travesty.

Regina seemed to be having a good time though. She seemed less sick than last week, hardly any coughing. Though she really only addressed the audience extraneously twice, once to say this was her first time ever in Miami (mine too!) and to thank the band and crew and everyone for making the US tour a success. Somewhere during Oh Marcello, I noticed the girls next to me had located a setlist from a recent show online and were intently studying it. Instead of fucking listening to regina as she played Ballad of a Politician they mused aloud “only 4 songs left?! Wow this has gone by so fast.” I mean wtf?! you immature brats, you are standing in the front row of regina’s show (regina, who you “LOVE” and have be “dying to see” for “5 years”) why don’t you try SEEING her, respecting her???? This is life, it’s happening in front of your blind freaking eyes, not inside your godforsaken phone. *Add this incident to the list of reasons I wish reg’s setlist could be a tad less static, man alive…

Earlier the girls had been super concerned about regina getting mad regarding the camera flashes, and I had reassured them it would be fine (just don’t use flash) and that I’ve only seen her get upset when people make noise during songs, like TALKING especially during quiet parts. I was explicit and descriptive and it was a long, detailed conversation with examples. Now here they are ignoring everything I said totally unconcerned. WHHYYYYYYY?!!!!!!!!!!!!!? During Open, they needed to have yet another discourse, worrying about the stupid brother, that he was getting tired of this concert (he was back in the seated area with the parents). Honestly, who gives a fuck? You shouldn’t. You’re in the front row, allegedly having the time of your life. I’m sure you parents can handle him, just like they have been for the last decade and a half. It just sucksss when dumb people like this are taking up prime space in the front, where I desperately wish someone deserving and appreciative could be. To them it’s just a good story; they can tell their friends and make a tweet and a fb post and get more cool points for getting “front row” at some concert. And that friends, is just so, soooo far from my own front row intentions it sickens me. I realize, not everyone can have my passion for regina. I think it’s great that people who aren’t even fans (yet) come to shows, that people drag their friends along. However, it’s so foreign to me how people can completely fail to have any manners whatsoever, that they can have total disrespect for the fact that a real live person is performing, and not only that, but that other people are trying to hear/see/enjoy it. Again, maybe this whole predicament has been caused by the fact that a lot of concerts now aren’t really about the music anyway- they’re more about being noticed, they’re about shock value, loudness and outrageousness; therefore, desperate overdone loud obnoxious social media addicts are considered prime audience members. The more attention they get the “entertainer” at any cost, the better. People are blind if they can’t figure out this is not the case for regina, her greatness speaks for itself.

Annnd back from that tangent… people were singing along quite a bit for sailor song and folding chair. I was smiling hard when she played Folding Chair. Although it seemed rather uptempo I didn’t mind, it felt summer again with being in Miami and all. I had just seen the beach and buried my feet in the sand and the felt the breeze, and it was just too perfectly appropriate. The whole show I felt like I kept opening my eyes wider and wider and breathing less and less trying not to miss anything, knowing that this was it, there would be no next show. Open was particularly aching, as I prayed it wouldn’t be immediately ousted from the setlist after this. It’s just too incredible!!!!!! The Party is perfect. There’s no way to not smile especially now that people clap every show. I sense that she likes that trend as well, and purposefully elicits the applause now by pausing extra at that moment to indicate that her words are indeed a call to action.

The encore break was very long, but the audience clapped mightily throughout. The girls beside me debated about whether they should leave (uh..yes!) but opted to stay. The couple on my right departed because they had a party to go to (as I said…not diehard, not even close) and a different girl stepped into their spot. Thankfully this also made enough room for the girl behind me to quit feeling up my ass for the first time all night. Regina proceeded with the regular encore starting with Us. Everyone was singing along, the two girls behind me were particularly loud and hideous and by the time Fidelity came around I could no longer hear regina at all. Singing, it’s ok, especially during the encore. I realize this is fun and you are excited and regina is your “hero” but sing well and do it in unison with the rest of the crowd NOBODY wants to hear YOU. And if you think regina will notice you if you sing loud enough, NOPE. She absolutely won’t, especially not over the voices of several hundred other dumbasses like you. Sorry, NOBODY paid to listen to you, nobody walked, drove or flew to that venue so that YOU could sing to them, so until they do, STFU!!! UGGHHH. This god-awful singalong nightmare continued into Hotel Song when the girl who had just stepped up next to me turned around and gave the sucky sing-alongs a piece of her mind, “Can you please not sing so loud? I can’t even hear regina! I paid to hear her, not YOU!” The girl fell silent, but had to relay the exchange with her companion who evidentially couldn’t hear it initially. Being told to quiet down? Who would dare?! She’s God, obviously… And this is America. Her ire raised, so did her singing volume. Save my soul. The other girl remained quite, thankfully. After Samson, regina stood and waved, and I felt in suspended animation. This can’t be over. Nooooo…

But it was over, and as her tour manager shined a flashlight and held the black curtain from her pathway, regina exited for the last time. Before completely disappearing into the darkness she gave him a high-five, a perfect final image etched on my brain.

After the show I bought all the merch I didn’t already own and waited for the crowd to dwindle. FYI- get the Only Son shirt it is super comfy, the material is awesome! Jack and I had a nice long (under these circumstances) chat as the merch was getting packed up. I couldn’t have been happier really when I finally stepped out into the night, I felt so loved and appreciated. People were taking photos with the mega huge regina poster encased outside the venue on the wall. They were remarking about the poor resolution of the picture, how crappily pixelated it was blown up that huge, how, “let’s be serious, regina doesn’t exactly get the best people to do this stuff. Have you seen her website?” Ouch. But at the same time… I can’t really argue. Yes, I’m saying it, sorry. It’s not exactly regina’s job to design a website or produce high res images or even really care about that shit, but people who work for her should. I just think if you get to work for regina, come on! Do a freaking amazing job, because she warrants it!

It was warm but windy as I trudged back to see how horrible the situation was by the bus area. On my way, I encountered the girl who had berated the sing-alongs, and I thanked her for doing it. We talked a little, she’d also come alone. Why couldn’t I have found her sooner?! We walked to the back of the venue together to behold the sight of 50 or more people plastered against a metal fence like animals with others sprawling across the lawn and parking lot noshing on pizza and McDonalds. A large parking lot was situated behind the building with regina’s busses and trucks parked in it as well as venue staff vehicles. The lot was surrounded by a high metal fence with vertical bars. An equally tall gate sealed off the entrance, but stood open just wide enough to accommodate a single metal barrier (the kind you all know), obviously to facilitate a potential meeting. People were packed behind that barrier 10 deep. Insane, but expected. It was almost midnight and I opted to stand at the side so I could actually see what was happening. The truck was backed up to a loading dock and equipment was being shuffled in, to the right of the truck was an exit door and a long ramp down to the parking lot. There would be no missing her egress.

Apparently I looked highly suspicious to the security guys by not being some rabid fan frothing at the mouth by that gate, so they repeatedly walked over in my general direction and told me specifically not to do anything like climb the fence (uhh…right…) and reminded me they were watching. Ok, yeah, sorry I’m not some pack animal. After waiting for at least another 30minutes Brad and Mathias came out. People were begging them to know about regina. Someone offered Mathias a foot massage if he told them when she was coming out. “That would be nice” he said, as they headed to the bus. A short time later they emerged again and were let out of the compound. I sprinted over to say Hi. They recognized me, but had “very limited time to get one drink.” They said they’d be back, “before regina even comes out” and continued on their way. I watched them walk away and struggled mightily with the decision not to follow. It would be great sit down and get a drink with them, but leaving now… could be a fatal error.

My judgment proved sound; they had not returned by the time regina made her way down that long ramp towards us just after 1am. There were shrieks and applause and a mass of people pressing into the barrier, this was going down just as I’d imagined, in awful flaming chaos. People were actually on the ground reaching through the gate with whatever they had, begging for autographs. They’d waited 5 years, they’d waited forever, and now they were on their knees, quite literally, begging. It was a sight to behold, it was both amazing, in a way, and degrading. Regina’s fans were zoo animals, monkeys reaching through the fence in hopes of being handed the almighty banana. I don’t know if I could’ve/would’ve ever done that. There was something seriously demoralizing about the whole scene. One of the guys who’d learned Russian had been at the front and, evidentially, gotten a hug from regina. I was happy for him, he deserved it. It meant something to him, he was hyperventilating almost to the point of tears. People were bitter that her manager wasn’t letting them take pictures and she was rushing through. Though there was still a hoard of people, me at the back of it, I heard him say, “ok we’re done in two more seconds!” That was my signal to shove past everyone. As I reached the gate, her manager was ushering her backward. She saw me and hugged me, thanking me for coming, she was saying my name. I thanked her for all of this too. It's been such an amazing time. Almost nothing better could’ve come from that shitty situation, so I was over the moon. She said my name, twice. =)

I was so so happy. Walking back to my hotel my mind a warm fuzzy oblivion, and the only thing I could think was “hot night wind was blowing.” Insidious, it was so damn accurate. Stupid Carly Rae, get out, get out, get out!


Only Son-



(attack of the dreadful singalongs)











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and the only thing I could think was “hot night wind was blowing.” Insidious, it was so damn accurate. Stupid Carly Rae, get out, get out, get out!

I've managed to avoid this by getting familiar with


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Jamie of course she knows your name! She's only seen you like a million times :) But I am sure she was super happy to see you while everyone else was acting insane. The walking back in oblivion part totally reminded me of the CT we all walked away in a fuzzy happy haze. Reading this made me super traveling back in time like I was actually there haha. And the Only Son shirt is the best! I wish all my shirts were that soft and comfy.

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